Numbers

Weight.

It's a loaded word isn't it?! Discussions about weight seem to have an ability to polarise opinion and offend like no other conversation can, especially in this online sphere.

As numbers go, weight is a number everyone seems to know about themselves, (along with their postcode and phone number) yet are infinitely less willing to share with others. Any corner shop or doctor's surgery is rammed with glossy magazines stacked with the latest fad diet formula to lose 10 pounds by next Tuesday.

It's a headspace I bought into, wholeheartedly for my entire adult life (until very recently!) Seeing the numbers drop= success, good Sarah, permission to feel attractive; seeing the numbers rise= failure, bad Sarah, what a heffer etc. I've tried Atkins, Slimming World, Weight Watchers- all great programmes and all entirely fixated on WEIGHT.

Except those numbers had no way of knowing or relating to what else was going on in my life at the time. 2 1/2 years in a wheelchair? Your weight may well rise. Beating on yourself and feeling like a failure is not a headspace conducive to recovery or health. Depressed or having an emotionally rough time? Factor in a weight gain and make yourself feel even worse about yourself! How about an amazing, sunny holiday? Eat what you like, come back heavier and guilt trip yourself- undoing all the relaxation and calm of the previous week.

I started my journey into fitness and healthy living with a huge weight focus- I wanted to see those numbers drop so that I would know that it was 'working'. Amazingly (although it did my head in at the time) the Whole30 programme forbids you from weighing yourself for the whole 30 days that you follow the regime- forcing you to focus on how you're feeling, your health, energy levels, skin, sleep quality and mood. The first few days of eating avocados, nuts, coconut oil, olive oil etc without being able to weigh in and 'check' if it was working or not really freaked me out! However, after 30 days I felt incredible- and was measuring my health and 'success' in a far more holistic way than just a number on a scale. When I then weighed myself, as it turned out, I'd lost a stone- the worries about eating so much fat were totally unfounded.

That 30 days kickstarted my journey into a healthy lifestyle, and I now measure my health in a huge range of ways, how I feel, how healthy/ill I've been, the amount of weight I can lift, the distance I can run/swim/cycle/walk, how hard I can jump around in praise and worship at church without getting out of breath, how fast I can run in a game of duck duck goose with the kiddos at work without breaking a sweat, and how many chips I can eat without that horrible little voice in my head telling me they are bad, will make me fat, are 'naughty' or 'wrong'. I've also learned that I can change shape drastically without changing weight (due to muscle building or starting a new type of exercise) and that hormones or neglecting my hydration can wreck havoc on the numbers on the scale on one day, without having any lasting impact on my weight.

So here are some numbers that tell far more of my story- some from the past, some from the present, some are set and some are changing but every single one of them are infinitely more important to me than any number on a scale:

1 husband,  2 amazing parents and 2 wonderful parent-in-laws
1 naughty kitten and 1 slightly better behaved guineapig
2 brothers and 13 brothers- and sisters-in-law
5 awesome, hyper little nieces and nephews
2 BAs, 1 PGCE and almost 1 Masters between me and the boy
8+ jobs between us in the last 3 years
1 illness in the last year (requiring 4 days off work- Norovirus (yuk!)) In previous years I've often jumped from bug to bug throughout the winter without ever really feeling 'healthy'.
Kicked shingles with no time off within 14 days
I can run 10 miles in under 2 hours
I can swim 1k
I can cycle at least 20k (haven't tried further yet)
2 Triathlons booked for this summer
1 10k race booked for May
151 children in my class since I started teaching
Over 250 kids reached through our community kids club since it began
I've lived in 3 countries since I was 18
2 years using a wheelchair
I can speak/read 3 languages
1 cross+ 4 nails= my worth being defined by something far, far bigger than anything in this list!

Focussing your view of your health and fitness on just your weight will only limit, frustrate and demotivate you! Be brave- set goals for yourself based on something other than your weight- a new sport, a new distance, a new race or a new PB and watch how your relationship with your body, exercise and food changes!

The Tri-Suit...

This Tuesday, just before lunch, I found myself in the changing room of the new Pearl Izumi store in Gunwharf Quays, trying to contort and squeeze myself into the most lycra I have ever voluntarily put onto my body- a trisuit! For me, a perpetually 'bigger' girl, and proud exercise avoider for most of my adult life, standing in all-in-one spandex in front of a fluorescent lit floor-to-ceiling mirror threw me into a bizarre 'what the heck am I doing here, in this ridiculous suit' moment, causing me to pause and take stock of the past 12 months, and the various factors which had led to that particular point, and that particular changing room!

My shiny and oh-so-spandex trisuit

A year ago, I was tired, stressed and overweight. (Obese, if you ask the lovely people who make the BMI!) A history of being in bottom set for PE, punctuated by a run in with ME/CFS for over half my teenage years, as well as some pesky hypermobile joints, meant that I could barely run for a bus, although I could hold my own in a sailing dinghy! I lost some of the weight around age 18, but Uni, marriage, starting work and holding down some pretty insane working hours for the last 4 years had watched it creep back on and I was back at the biggest I'd ever been.
Something had to change, and change it did! Exactly a year ago this week, the hubs and I embarked on our first Whole30 and ate clean for a month (punctuated by a lovely bout of shingles!) 30 days later and shingles beaten in record time, I wanted to continue to make healthier lifestyle choices, so embarked on the couch25k programme. 8 weeks of mostly eating clean, and running 3x a week later, and, to my amazement, I could run 5k without stopping once!

Straight after running my first ever 5k- in 25 degree heat!

A few weeks post 5k and I realised that without a goal, I wasn't going to keep in my new routine for long (I kept stopping when my feet hurt!!). I searched for a 5k race, and, in all of my searching kept coming across the Great South Run. 10 miles! If anything, I'm stubborn and once the idea of running the Great South took hold, I just couldn't shift it! So, in August I downloaded this fab beginner-10 mile running plan on the advice of a great friend and ultra-marathon runner who seems to think one can do anything, as long as one sticks to the training plan!
12 weeks of training later and it was GSR day. God had my back and it was a cool bright day for my first ever race; 1.52 later and it was all over! (Particular thanks to a lovely friend Emma who bumped into me at the 6 mile mark and ran with me through my toughest half mile!)

Post Great South Run

My hypermobility has gifted me with a knee which is flaky at best, and has dislocated a couple of times. In the run up to the GSR, it had really begun to pickle and it was only with the help of a great physio that my knee and I made it to the finish line!

It became clear that further distance running could prove expensive and problematic for the gammy knee and I, so I needed to find another way to meet my new-found enjoyment for endurance sport!

I started cross training at the gym while I pondered my options- my newfound confidence from running carried me into classes which I'd never have dared to even peek through the door at 3 months previously.

At Christmas, I decided to bite the bullet and head into the next challenge- Triathlon. 2/3 disciplines are low impact- excellent for the gammy knee and still letting me get my running fix in! I started swimming and going to spin to prepare for the Portsmouth try a tri in June, as well as keeping the running going. This routine, combined with my faith, great friends and wonderful family actually carried me through a pretty rough patch this winter, giving me something to clear my head and a lovely endorphin kick afterwards!

I'd started to lose the momentum in my training as June is still pretty far away; luckily I found out on Monday that David Lloyd (the gym where I'd gone for physio) are running a Sprint Tri on April 26th. Even better, it's a pool swim (far less scary than the Solent!). So; I signed up- leading me to a suddenly urgent need for a tri-suit, and that scary changing room in Gunwharf!

1 year, 4 stone down and 1 trisuit later- I'm kitted out and ready to rock and roll!

I'm hoping to use this blog to continue to document my journey into health and fitness, and my training for the triathlon. I'll probably include a few food-y and travel posts (2 other massive passions of mine). My faith is a huge part of my story so expect it to also be making an appearance!